hello friends. wow. i guess i stepped away from the blog for a while for a little breathing space. it wasn’t intentional, just needed. and today i feel like i am returning from a little mini vacation. i feel refreshed and ready to go. i have learned to listen when my heart says it needs a break.
i feel like i have learned so much about myself since the beginning of the year. it’s not some new revelation… it’s something that i have always known about myself, but just didn’t know how to embrace it.
i am an introvert.
for the longest time i didn’t want to be an introvert. i wanted to be cool like the extroverts who have all of the friends and seem so at ease in social situations. i love spending time with extroverts because they are just so much fun to be around. some of my best friends are extroverts. my husband is an extrovert. my daughter is an extrovert.
of course, i would have to say that over the years i have learned how to adapt, to be more outgoing. i am not afraid to talk to people like i used to be. and most people don’t even know that i am an introvert.
but it’s just been recently that i have been giving myself permission to be alone. permission to schedule in some solitude… and. not. feel. guilty.
hello my name is wendy. and i am an introvert. and i need time alone. and that’s ok.
wow. i have even been asking my family for alone time. which is huge when your husband always wants to be with you. and i have to remind him that it’s not personal, it’s just what i need. and then i can come back refreshed and ready to give more to my family. it’s even harder for me to explain to my six year old daughter who never wants to be alone. but i think that it is good for her to learn early that some people just need to be alone. who knows, she might marry an introvert.
what i have also realized is that i desperately need solitude in order to create. it’s one of the primary ingredients. and the quality of product that comes out of solitude is just so much better than when i am running around like a crazy person trying to get everything done.
i always thought of solitude as just being lazy. i guess that is my perfectionist side still trying to get out. but how can connecting with my heart and with god and with what is going on in my life be lazy?
i feel so much lighter now. so much more accepting of who i am and who i was created to be. and that feels amazing!!!
another thing i am learning is that being an introvert does not mean that i don’t desire connection. i just desire meaningful vulnerable real connection with people. and it’s funny, the more solitude i give myself, the more connected i want to be with other people. kind of bizarre huh?
and if you are an introvert… i give you permission to make a little more room for solitude in your life.