do you ever feel like you are just pretending? pretending to be an artist and have a creative business? sometimes i look at some of my role models who have “made it” and i feel this little twinge of intimidation. will i ever stand in that place? it is really easy to compare your path to others and feel so very small.
i recently became a published artist. and it felt huge! to see my name in a national magazine. wow! and yet at the same time, i still felt like a tiny little fish in a huge pond. don’t get me wrong, i am not trying to make light of being published. i just sometimes feel as if i am only pretending. silly i know.
but the truth is that we all have our own paths to forge. the path to my dreams will never look like kelly rae’s, donna downey’s or alisa burke’s. it isn’t supposed to. because i have my own dreams. i have a different story to tell. and i have a different way to get there. and when i remember those things, that little twinge of fear goes away.
and the reality is that we all start somewhere. i need to embrace this part of my journey. i need to be thankful for where i am right now in this very moment. because there are things that i need to learn right now. if i were to skip this part, i would be missing an important part of my journey. and i would probably fall flat on my face. i am not ready for my dreams just yet. there are things that need to built in me first.
you see, the journey is what prepares our hearts to hold our dreams. our hearts need to grow wider, and deeper and stronger to hold those huge big giant dreams. and the only way to do that, is to embrace the process.
so if i am just pretending, i might as well keep on doing it. pretending until i am not pretending anymore.
kelly rae roberts wrote a great post on pretending until we’re not pretending anymore. you can read it here.