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January 10, 2011

let go of fears

week 42 of 52 weeks; fears. i am having THE most difficult time writing this post and i am not exactly sure why. i have always been able to articulate my fears before, but now i am at a loss for words. putting words to the thoughts inside my head is making my brain spin. i am starting to realize that at this point in my journey, my fears are changing. i am not really afraid of rejection or failure anymore like i used to be. i realize now that failure and rejection just comes with territory. it is not personal, just something that will most likely happen somewhere along my journey. but, back to my current fears.

does it sound funny that i am afraid of the unknown? because that is the only way i can describe the feelings i am facing. i am entering a part of my journey that is new and i don’t really know what to expect. and because of this i feel a little unsure about what i am doing. you see, i had a HUGE success last week that has left me feeling excited, exhilarated, amazed, humbled and grateful. i am quite simply, blown away. success feels so new and different. i know that as i step more into this success, my whole journey is going to be different from here on out. and walking in the unknown of success is, well, kind of scary. it is not that i am afraid of success itself, but just the unknown territory that i am walking in. does that make sense? i hope so.

i know that this post will leave many of you wondering, and i honestly didn’t mean to write this post to leave you hanging. i am simply not ready to share this news with you just yet. but i promise, it will be soon!

5 Comments leave one →
  1. Erin K permalink
    January 10, 2011 11:05 am

    Congratulations on your success. I can’t wait to hear your news! It sounds awesome whatever it is.

  2. January 10, 2011 12:54 pm

    I think with every big change we go through as people, then again as artists, it’s pretty natural to be tentative about those changes. You know life will be different from here on out, and you hope it’s a positive thing. I think what you’re feeling is normal, natural, and to be expected.

    But while fear of the unknown is so deeply embedded in everyone (it totally goes back to the cave men), the unknown doesn’t have to be negative; I believe it can be positive.

    • January 10, 2011 2:25 pm

      Brandi – you’re right we just need to change the perception.

  3. January 10, 2011 2:24 pm

    I live with fear and mostly it is of the un-known. Sometimes I think it needs a new word because fear applies to too many things and has too many variants. Don’t worry, we’ll patiently wake for when and if you want to talk about it.

    love to you

  4. January 10, 2011 3:16 pm

    this is really lovely. *hope again*. i love it.

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